I swear she didn't look like that last week.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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