I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I want her autograph on my taint
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Randomize
