What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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