If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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