In America we eat man semen.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
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