why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize