i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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