True but thats because hes a fetus.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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