It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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