I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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