She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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