and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
