Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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