the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
