so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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