I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i just google imaged poop.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
