my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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