I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
