That reminds me...we need to get swords
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
