Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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