She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
