i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
