Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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