Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
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