Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
should my penis look like a turkey
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
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