We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Someone signed my nipple.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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