So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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