So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
