so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
BRING THE BAGELS
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
