ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
