I'm lost and stupid without you.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
