He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
