Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
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