We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
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