My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
