He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
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