Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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