i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Bang-toberfest begins!!
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
