Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
