i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
