so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
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