Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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