4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Sober January is a disaster.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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