I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
So vagazzling was a success
i think we sleep fucked last night...
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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