Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
