Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
