Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
