Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
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