He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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