i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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