TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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